If You Were Mine Read online

  No.

  Not just for some reason.

  There’s a very definite reason.

  I want Claire to acknowledge that there’s something going on between us. Something more than me being the one to take her virginity. Our relationship is so much more than what it was a mere month ago. I’m tired of pretending that it’s not. And I really fucking hate the way her brother Cullum keeps eyeing me up like I’m not good enough for her.

  Or worse… like she needs protecting from me.

  He’s eyeing me the same damn way I was watching Ryan.

  “What, Claire?” My voice whips out sounding harsher than I intend it to.

  But she doesn’t answer. Instead, she continues peppering my mouth with kisses before nibbling at the corners of my lips.

  Gahhhh.

  Yeah, I know what she’s trying to do with this maneuver. I invented this maneuver. It’s exactly what I do to her every single time she starts talks about finding a place of her own.

  Well… it’s not going to work.

  It’s…

  Damnit.

  It’s working.

  Her little pink tongue darts out, licking at the seam of my lips until I’m opening. Until I’m groaning. Until my tongue is dancing and mingling with hers. And then whatever the hell I’d been so focused on disappears without a trace, and there’s just her and the need she stokes so easily to life within me.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Claire

  As we sit down to dinner, Cullum quickly parks himself next to me. It’s almost comical the way he throws himself down as if we’re playing a game of musical chairs and the music has just stopped.

  JT gives me a flat look before sitting directly across from me. It doesn’t escape me that Cullum is trying to keep me away from JT. I’m a little surprised that he’s only just walked into the situation and is somehow more attuned to the undercurrents swirling between the pair of us than either Liam or Gia.

  I can only imagine the kind of inquiry that will be launched once Cullum manages to get me alone. Questions that I’m in no way prepared to answer. If either one of my brothers figures out that I’m staying at JT’s house, they will have the shit fit to end all shit fits.

  That’s a given.

  Gaze sliding to JT, my mind tumbles back to what happened in the laundry room. I mean… what the heck was that all about?

  Now he wants to tell people, my family specifically, about what’s going on between us?

  I think the bigger question is- what the hell is going on between us?

  Because I don’t have any flipping clue. Other than I plan on sleeping with the guy. And let me be completely honest when I say that there is no way on God’s green earth that I’m telling Liam and Gia that.

  Or Cullum.

  Is JT having some kind of psychotic break from reality?

  Liam has made it perfectly clear that he doesn’t want me anywhere near his teammates. The last thing he wants to overhear is some dude talking trash about his sister in the locker room. He doesn’t want rumors flying around. Nor does he want to have any problems with his teammates.

  I totally get it.

  And I’ve never had an issue with his no-fraternization rule either.

  Honestly?

  It made things a lot easier. I didn’t have to worry about shutting guys down, and they could look at me as the team little sister and nothing more. It worked for everyone involved.

  All Liam has done since he was fifteen years old is take care of me. Take care of all of us. He busted his ass in high school and then left college early so he could start earning money in the pros. I don’t want to do anything that will hurt him or break his trust in me.

  I’m so lost in thought that I don’t realize the entire table has gone silent. Everyone except for Ty and Charlotte. They’re still being their loud, boisterous selves. It takes another moment before I become aware that the three other adults at the table are now staring at Cullum.

  As I study the brother closest to me in age, I realize that something is wrong. My brows slowly draw together as I quietly wait to be filled in. For just a moment, my eyes shift, catching JT’s green ones. He’s just staring at me from across the table. There’s an odd look on his face.

  Sympathy, maybe?

  But there’s no time to question it because Liam suddenly bellows from his seat at the head of the table-

  “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! How long has this been going on for?”

  Mouth tumbling open, my gaze snaps to my oldest brother in astonishment.

  Gia gasps before saying in a calm voice belying the thick tension now filling the dining room, “I’m going to take the kids into the kitchen.” With that, she gathers up their plates. “Come on. You two can sit in here, and we’ll turn on a show.”

  It’s like both Ty and Charlotte understand that their father is angry because it’s silently that they follow their mother into the other room. Usually, Liam takes care not to swear in front of them. Before I can push out any questions, Cullum grabs my hand enfolding it within his larger one before giving it a gentle squeeze.

  “She’s been back for about a month now.”

  “Why is this the first time we’re hearing about it? You should have called us the moment she showed up at your door.”

  I still don’t understand what they’re talking about. But the pit sitting at the bottom of my belly continues to grow as my eyes dart back and forth between my brothers.

  Looking tense, Cullum shrugs as his eyes stay locked on Liam’s. “Because I knew this is exactly how you would react.” His voice drops just a bit as he adds, “And I wanted to make sure that she was actually going to stick around. There didn’t seem much point in riling everyone up if she was just going to take off again.”

  Those words leave me feeling like I’m suddenly in freefall. It takes a moment for me to catch my breath. I don’t know why everything suddenly becomes crystal clear, but it does. When I finally realize why Liam is so angry, I can’t really say that I blame him.

  Far more calmly than I’m feeling, I ask, “What does she want, Cullum? Why is she back after all this time?”

  Sucking in full breaths of air actually feels painful. Surprisingly more painful than I expected. After my mother left, I sobbed into my pillow every single night for almost six months. And I prayed. Prayed that she would come back to us. She never did. Being just ten years old, it was unfathomable to me that she could just turn her back and walk away from us.

  No explanation.

  No goodbye.

  Nothing.

  After a while, I did what I had to. I buried all the pain and questions somewhere deep inside and moved on. There were far more important things to worry about. Once she disappeared, my dad checked out. At least mentally. Maybe he was there physically, but that was about it. He had his share of drinking and gambling problems. Eventually, we lost our house.

  It took a while, but my dad finally seems to have his shit together. The last thing we need is for her to sweep back into our lives and mess everything up again. Because that’s exactly what she’ll do. She doesn’t care about us. How could she possibly? You don’t walk away from the people you love.

  You just don’t do that.

  For the first time since everything became quiet, Cullum glances down at his half-finished plate before finally spearing me with his wary blue eyes.

  “She wants to talk with you.” He shoots Liam a glance as well. “With both of you.”

  “But why?” I shake my head. “Why now? She’s been gone for eleven years.”

  Sucking in a breath, he releases it slowly. Like a balloon with a slow leak. “That’s for her to tell you, not me.”

  Leaning forward, Liam’s eyes flash with unspent anger.

  Anger that has been brewing for more than a decade.

  “I’m not interested in anything she has to say.” He stabs his finger towards the kitchen where Gia, Ty, and Charlotte are finishing up their dinner. “I hav
e a wife and three kids, just like she did. And there is no damn way I could just pick up and leave them.” Pounding his fist on the table, the plates and silverware rattle against the polished wood. I jump, my eyes flaring with shock. Liam has never scared me, but he does now. I’ve never seen him like this. “There is nothing in this world that could tear me away from them. Nothing! I don’t want that woman in my life and I sure as hell don’t want her anywhere near my family. You be sure to tell her that!”

  Cullum remains silent as he continues staring at Liam. When it becomes apparent that our brother isn’t going to budge from his stance, Cullum’s eyes slowly shift to mine. The question is written clearly within them.

  “I’m sorry, Cullum. I don’t want anything to do with her either. There’s nothing she can say that will make what she did okay.”

  Without any further words, Cullum pushes away from the table before leaving the dining room altogether. I know he’s angry with us. But there’s nothing I can do about that. If he wants to let Beverly into his life, that’s up to him. I won’t open myself up to that kind of pain ever again.

  Liam scrubs a hand tiredly over his face before he rises as well, silently heading into the kitchen. I hear Liam and Gia’s subdued voices but can’t make out the words being spoken between them.

  And then it’s just the two of us sitting silently in the dining room. I have to say, I did not see any of this coming. I’m almost in a state of numbness and shock regarding the whole situation. I never expected Beverly to suddenly reappear in our lives again. Not after all this time. I can’t even begin to imagine why she would come back. But one thing’s for sure, whatever the reason- I don’t care. It no longer matters.

  “Are you okay?”

  Nope.

  Not at all.

  There is so much emotion rushing through every fiber of my being. I find that I can only shake my head in answer.

  Abruptly he stands. In eight long strides, he’s on the other side of the table. Grabbing my hand, he silently tugs me into his arms. Then he’s holding me close, dropping light kisses on the top of my head before whispering, “Come on, let’s go home.”

  I can only nod as thoughts of my mother, the woman who abandoned us, tumble unwantedly through my head.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  JT

  I wake with Claire cradled in my arms. I’m starting to think I could do this every single day for the rest of my life. How crazy is that?

  Pretty damn crazy, I know.

  But I love having her here in my home. I like that it no longer feels so empty. I enjoy coming home at the end of the day, after practice, and finding her puttering around in the oversized kitchen, throwing something together for dinner.

  Know what else I love?

  Seeing her curled up on the couch as she pours over a textbook. She’s so damn studious. It probably shouldn’t be so hot. But it is. I can barely keep my hands to myself. It doesn’t take long before I’m sliding them between her thighs, maneuvering my way into her panties before stroking her soft, wet heat.

  It’s almost adorable how she’ll initially resist my efforts only to give in after a moment or two before spreading those long gorgeous legs of hers and letting me do whatever the hell I want.

  God, but I really do love that.

  I love just how much she enjoys being touched.

  And touching her… It’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. I find myself wanting to give her everything. And then some. I want to make every single flick of my fingers amazing for her. Even if I’m walking away with blue balls at the end of the night. The way she sighs my name, her soft moans that fill the air… it all makes me hard as steel.

  Know what I don’t like?

  When she starts talking about finding a new place.

  Yup… I usually shut that down right-quick. Apparently running my soft tongue over her pussy is the perfect distraction. Can’t say I don’t enjoy it.

  But that’s the thing… I can’t say that I don’t enjoy any of it.

  I’m in no rush to see her go. It’s almost disturbing just how much I want her to stay. Whatever this is between us, I want to keep it going for as long as I can.

  I know she worries about what Liam will think, but I’m not concerned. He’ll get over whatever qualms he has against me being with his sister once he sees just how serious I am about her.

  And I know we haven’t exactly talked about what we’re doing here, but it seems fairly obvious to me that we’re growing closer. This is more than me just getting her off. At least it is for me. I care about Claire. I’ve always cared. But now those feelings go way deeper.

  I want her to be part of my life.

  At the moment, her curvy ass is exactly where I like it, which is snug against my iron-hard cock. I swear to god, anytime I’m touching her, I can’t help but rock some major wood. Hell, just catching a glimpse of her has me stiffening up.

  She sighs as I palm her breast, strumming the nipple. She’s got the most perfect breasts. I’ve been out with a lot of women over the years, and I’ve fucked a good number of them. I’ve always preferred women with generous breasts. Big, beautiful titties that I could play with for hours. But Claire isn’t built like that. She’s slender. Everything about her is slight. From her hips and belly to her breasts, I find myself utterly fascinated by her.

  She’s a perfect handful.

  And all that hair…

  Sometimes I imagine what it would feel like if she trailed it across my body. It’s as dark as a raven’s wing and just as silky-soft, falling in a thick rich curtain down her back. I fantasize about her straddling my hips until I’m buried balls-deep within her so that I can wrap the length of it around my fist, pulling tight so that she has to arch her body as she rides me hard.

  Those images are enough to leave my cock feeling as if I just might blow the tip right off as it settles at the juncture between her legs. Stroking my erection against her is sweet torture. She moans softly in her sleep. Damn, but she’s adorable. It’s nothing more than a breathy little sound leaving her lips.

  Over the last two weeks, I’ve lost track of all the orgasms I’ve given Claire. But I’ve yet to make love to her.

  It’s gotten to the point where I don’t know if I can hold back any longer. And I find, as her breast fills my palm and I press sweet kisses against her neck, that I don’t want to. In the beginning, I wanted to give her time. Time to be sure about what she wanted. But in the last week, she’s been the one who has been coming after me. Trying to seduce me, if you can believe that.

  Plus… maybe I just wanted to drive her a little bit crazy.

  Maybe I wanted her to want me the way I’ve always craved her.

  Maybe I just needed to draw this out between us.

  Maybe I wanted her to finally realize that she actually likes being with me.

  That we can make this work if she would just give it a chance.

  It’s slowly that I trail my hand down her rib cage until I’m gliding over her belly before my fingers are able to slip between her slender legs and find her warmth. Even in her sleep, she opens for me. It’s gently that I move them in and out of her before dragging the digits across her lower lips until I’m able to circle her clit.

  The sound she makes is low and throaty.

  Music to my ears.

  Her breathing picks up its tempo as her eyelids flutter open. Widening her legs, her hips rotate to the rhythm of my fingers.

  “You like that, baby?”

  “You know I do.” She lifts her hips just a fraction. “Please…”

  “Please what?”

  Using my hands and mouth, I stroke her, playing with her body until she’s on the cusp of falling apart. Just as she teeters on the brink, I pull back because I love hearing her beg. I love the desperation that fills every thread of her voice for something only I can give her.

  Maybe I need to hear her say the words out loud, to admit that it’s me she wants touching her, stroking that sweet
little pussy until she’s falling apart. I haven’t exactly figured out this deep need that I have for her. I just know it’s there. And it doesn’t appear to be going away anytime soon.

  “I want you inside me, JT. Please…”

  Almost leisurely I press my finger inside her until I’m buried deep. She gasps as I fill her. She’s so fucking tight. And hot. It’s like being cocooned in rich, decadent velvet. I can only imagine what she’ll feel like wrapped around my throbbing cock. Slowly I pump my finger in and out of her body. She’s so damn slick. And creamy. I just want to bury myself to the hilt within her.

  And then stay there for days.

  “Okay, baby. I’ll give you what you need.”

  After she rolls onto her back, I kneel between her legs. Staring into her eyes, I lean down, taking her lips as her arms snake around my neck. She tries pulling me down as her long, slender legs wrap tightly around my waist like a vise until her pussy is able to rub against my thick erection. I growl into her mouth as my tongue pummels hers.

  “You’re so fucking sexy, Claire.”

  “I want to feel you inside me.” Her gray eyes plead with mine. “I’m ready, JT. I don’t want to wait anymore.”

  I kiss those full pouty lips of hers knowing that I’m finally going to give in to her demands. I want her just as much, if not more. I always have. “Okay.”

  Her eyes widen in surprise. I don’t think she was expecting me to yield quite so easily. She has absolutely no idea just how difficult it’s been to continually resist her. To have her lying naked in my bed each night. So warm and inviting. Begging me to take her.

  This is the first time I’ve ever held off on making love- well, fucking someone. Because that’s exactly what it was. Pure and simple fucking. Dipping my wick. It’s not like I didn’t make sure that each woman walked away completely satisfied. But still… that’s all it was. Tapping some ass so I could get off.

  But this…

  With Claire.

  It’s so much more than that.

  Exactly what?